The Five Pillars
of Emotional Stability
A guide to raising
a happy & healthy dog
INTRODUCTION
If as the caregivers to our beloved dogs we focus on emotional health, we will see dogs live happier and healthier lives, while displaying fewer unwanted behaviours. Meaning, happier caregivers!
Forget an over reliance on obedience, outdated dominance theories and simply trying to tire them out to get ‘good’ behaviour. Those practices are outdated and cause more harm than good.
We bring dogs into our lives to make ourselves and them happy, for them to be a part of the family. This short book introduces the five key principles to making that happen.
At Bondi Behaviourist we have helped over 4000 people and their dogs since 2015, with a multitude of various training needs.
We specialise in a few key areas; including, helping puppy owners set solid foundations, helping families settle in a rescue dog and establish a healthy life together, and helping people overcome unwanted behaviours, from simple things like jumping up, to complex behaviour issues including anxiety and aggression cases.
The principles outlined in this book underpin everything we do no matter what stage you are at, so please enjoy.
ENRICHMENT
Understanding enrichment is key. It’s far more than simply giving our dogs puzzles, Kongs and Lickimats.
Our dogs’ enrichment needs are fundamental to their wellbeing and come under 14 main categories; Health/Veterinary, Hygiene, Physical Exercise, Sensory Stimulation, Safety of the dog and others, Security, Instinctual Behaviours, Foraging, Social Interaction, Mental Exercise, Independence, Environment and Calming.
Our dogs’ behaviour should be seen as communication and when we think about it, they are often communicating that one of these enrichment needs is currently the priority for them.
ENRICHMENT
When they’re unwell we can see it, when they’re not getting enough exercise they appear frustrated, when their social preferences are compromised they say it....
If we look at our dogs’ behaviour more through the lens of them communicating their needs, rather than something to stop, correct or even train, we may see a completely new perspective. Problem behaviours become something to help the dog with, rather than to squash, and certainly not to punish.
But this knowledge does not just inform how we react. If we are proactive with meeting these needs, ensuring that day to day we do our best to provide these fundamentals for our dogs, we will see our dogs far more stable, healthy and easier to communicate with and live with.
ENRICHMENT
When giving our dogs enrichment, there are some key factorsto consider:
Remember that the dog gets to decide whether it’s enrichment or not. It doesn’t matter if you thought the dog would like it... they have personal preferences 1.
Enrichment needs change by the moment, stay present
Breed traits can be a good indicator as to what they might like. For example, a bloodhound is likely to find sniffing highly enriching, whereas a sighthound might find chasing enriching. But, there are no guarantees!
Be aware as to what you actually want to achieve when you provide your dog with something. Don’t provide a stimulant like a ball to chase if you’re trying to create a calm environment.
SLEEP, REST, RECOVERY
One of the most underestimated enrichment needs of our dogs and yet so essential for healthy emotional regulation is sleep, rest and recovery.
We often want to do ‘ALL THE THINGS’ with our dogs and particularly in busy environments we see behaviours directly relatied to adrenal fatigue all of the time!
The old saying that “a tired dog is a happy dog” is rubbish. A tired dog is the same as a tired human. They’re grumpy, agitated, sensitive, moody and irrational. It’s a terrible goal to try to tire your dog out.
Instead, think back to the Enrichment section and we can easily replace the word tired with satisfied and get a far better outcome.
SLEEP, REST, RECOVERY
Most people are amazed to learn that dogs require 14-18 hours of sleep daily. It’s even more for puppies and senior dogs.
What’s also important is the quality of the sleep. If our dogs are waking up often (under an hour) then they’re not going to fall into the state of sleep that starts producing restorative endorphins. Plus, their nervous systems learn to stay on, resulting in a slow and steady accumulation of adrenaline and cortisol, the stress hormones.
Before we know it, that dog that we thought was asleep by the front window, is displaying reactive behaviours, primarily due to adrenal fatigue and its affects.
SLEEP, REST, RECOVERY
Enough high quality sleep can quite literally change your dog’s entire personality for the better, increase their resilience and help them feel safe and secure in day to day life.
Factors to consider to help your dog sleep well might be:
Manage where your dog has access. Locations such as next to the front window, porch and open front doors may be places to avoid allowing your dog to access unsupervised. Prevent constant vigilance by denying access and encouraging them to use comfy places where it’s calm and they can fall into deeper states of sleep.
Avoid moving beds around the home. They’re comfort locations as much as items.
Don’t disturb your dogs when they’re sleeping. Let sleeping dogs lie.
DIET & EATING PATTERNS
Diet is often associated with physical health and rightly so. The right diet can aid physical health and energy levels like nothing else.
But a lot of people may not have considered the benefits to their dog’s mental and emotional health.
Most of our dogs’ serotonin, an essential hormone for emotional regulation, is produced in the gut of our dogs and a healthy microbiome goes a long long way to ensuring emotional stability and behavioural health.
The more we learn about dog behaviour, the more and more often we see a correlation between dog behaviour and gut health. So often, we see dogs struggling with reactivity or anxiety issues also with poor gut health.
DIET & EATING PATTERNS
Getting on top of our dog’s diet can tip the scales in a training plan and if we’re proactive, it can be preventative for behavioural concerns.
The other factor we see make a big difference to our dogs’ dietary health is whether or not our dogs are eating meals or allowed to graze and snack.
Regular meals can do so much for our dogs including;
Bring a sense of safety and security through predictability day to day
Give us a chance to monitor health to know if they’re eating well or off their food
Makes toilet training easier
Increases the social bond between us and them, if we are somewhat associated with mealtimes.
DIET & EATING PATTERNS
We are not dietitians and so cannot comment on what to feed your dogs. The best people to seek this advice from is going to be a canine nutritionist or a vet.
What we can comment on is when eating or not eating is behavioural and the red flags we would love for you to look out for are:
Dogs waiting until the night time to eat
Dogs grazing but not eating when food is left available to them
Dogs guarding their food
These are all traits that if you see, perhaps consider reaching out to a trainer and asking for a professional opinion as to whether or not it is something to be concerned about.
EXERCISE
Exercise is another one that probably springs to mind when it comes to the health of our dogs. Most of us are probably well aware of the mental and emotional health benefits, as well as the physical. But, we see three common mistakes:
People assuming exercise is all the dog needs to be happy
People compromising their dog’s mental and emotional health in the name of physical exercise
People creating compulsive disorders in the name of physical exercise.
If any of these three were happening and we end up working together to address a behaviour issue... we would be be addressing this early because of its likely relevance to their unwanted behaviours.
EXERCISE
We’ve already stated that the enrichment needs of our dogs are far more complex than most originally realised and exercise is simply just one of the 14. It’s not even that much of a priority when we think about it! Exercise falls pretty far down the priority list, compared to a dog’s sense of safety, social connection and even only forms a small part of their fulfillment needs.
When we say “we see people compromise their dog’s mental and emotional health in the name of physical exercise”, this is what we see a lot of:
People taking their dogs on routes that lead to them feeling unsafe, anxious or even angry. We see this with people walking their dogs the same way each day, despite them barking and lunging or cowering every time.
EXERCISE
2. We see people take their dog into public settings, like dog parks, with their favourite toy, only for them to guard it and worry that others will take it.
At the end of the day, we take our dogs out and exercise them for our own and their enjoyment (well we hope that’s why you’re doing it anyway!). if you find yourself in a situation where you’re seeing unwanted behaviours regularly, ask yourself, is this really in the best interest of my dog?
And finally, the last thing we want to see and potentially the saddest thing we see, is when people mistake compulsive behaviours for play.
That dog that LOVES the ball and CANNOT stop fetching it...
EXERCISE
That’s a problem.
That dog is likely doing so out of compulsion, which is no different to an addict of our species. Yes, they do LOVE it, but that constant chase of the next hit is often followed by a sense of emptiness and lack of fulfillment. Hence, the need to get the next quick fix.
When we’re exercising our dogs we can help by:
Making sure we don’t overdo it
If we get them overstimulated (which can be fun) do so in places that it doesn’t compromise them or others
Maintain healthy levels of communication throughout. If our dogs can’t hear us/respond to us then we may be bordering on compulsion, so consider toning it down and allowing for some rest.
CONNECTION & RELATIONSHIP
At the very core of why we have dogs in our lives, is the connection we feel with them.
They’re our best friends, they’re our emotional support, our running buddy, cuddle buddy, snack sharer and always by our side.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, we bring them into our lives to make ourselves and them happy.
And yet, we see so many people communicate with them just so poorly, it’s a wonder our dogs don’t have more issues than they do.
There are some fundamentals that we encourage you to think about when training your dogs and interacting with them on a day to day basis.
CONNECTION & RELATIONSHIP
Identify what you want them to do, not just what you don’t want them to do - we see so many people tell us they want their dog to stop doing something, but when we ask, ‘what would you prefer they be doing instead?’ they literally have never thought about it. - If you don’t know, then don’t expect the dog to know
Be clear and consistent - once you’ve identified what you want and don’t want, be clear with them and be consistent. Blurring the lines on what the rules are sets them up to really misunderstand your expectations
Set them up to succeed - Don’t leave them in situations where you cannot supervise adequately, if there’s a chance they’re going to fail.
CONNECTION & RELATIONSHIP
4. Reward the behaviours you want to see - Make sure that your dog likes doing what you like them to do. They’ll naturally do more of it.
5. Hold yourself accountable more so than your dog - if you set them up to fail, don’t communicate with clarity and haven’t been rewarding desirable choices, then that’s on you, not the dog. Don’t scold the dog for your errors.
6. You can say no, but, before you do, make sure the previous five points have been addressed. If you do, then don’t punish with pain, fear, intimidation or coercion. That’s just bullying. And know that there’s a difference between training and real life. You’ll say no in real life, try not to, but it will happen. But if you’ve set up a training session and are saying no, then consider re-evaluating how you’re training your dog.
CONNECTION & RELATIONSHIP
Something we would ask you to strongly consider is the term leadership when it comes to our dogs.
For so long, people have thought to be a strong leader of our dogs we must dominate, be the alpha, hold our dogs accountable and correct unwanted behaviours.
We want you to think about what healthy leadership actually looks like.
The boss at work that micromanages, shouts, screams, doesn’t set clear expectations and then holds you accountable for not meeting them, the one that essentially is on a power trip, is unstable and punitive is not the boss we want to work for. That’s the epitome of unhealthy leadership and yet it’s often what has been taught to the public on dog training .
CONNECTION & RELATIONSHIP
Whether we want to be or not we are in a position of power when it comes to our dogs in this human world we live. We decide where they go, where and when they eat and so many aspects of their life. Even when they pee!
So we don’t need to prove to anyone that we’re the boss.
What we need to do is demonstrate healthy leadership skills like setting them up to succeed, taking responsibility for their behaviour if we set them up to fail, coaching and training them with patience, empathy and clarity, until they’re good at it not just until we think they should be good it at and being present and aware that they are living things with their own needs.
We want you to remember that it’s not a dictatorship, it’s a dialogue in which all parties needs must be heard.
SUMMARY
Every dog is perfectly imperfect, just like ourselves, and all dogs will display unwanted behaviours. It's how we respond that matters and the more proactive we are, the better! If we remember that behaviours are a reflection of our dogs’ overarching enrichment needs, then our focus moves away from “correcting the behaviour” and more towards meeting the enrichment need.
When we begin to feel ourselves trying to micromanage, dominate, get consistently angry, anxious or frustrated then it might be time to take a step back and re-examine our approach.
If we focus on the five fundamentals outlined in this short book, your life and your dog’s life will significantly improve.
THANK YOU
We’re all about bringing harmony into people’s homes, whether we’re raising a puppy or addressing unwanted behaviours.
Each one of our team started in this line of work because we love dogs, but each of us have come to learn at our own pace how much we love helping the whole family create a life in which they’re all happy.
If you’re ever in need of some support, we‘re here to help. We’ve got multiple resources in the form of online courses, in person support and via phone and Zoom.
Thank you for taking the time to read this e-book,
Ian Shivers & the Bondi Behaviourist team.